I echo your concern that in too many cases we are overprotecting our children from valuable life experiences. The way we learn to deal with failure and mistakes is by examining them in the safety of loving, nurturing relationships. Michael Ungar has written a book and raised these concerns in “Too Safe for Their Own Good”. Our children need experiences to develop their brain connections and if we are severely limiting all negative emotional experiences because we have fallen into the ‘happiness trap’, i.e.: we are good parents only to the degree that our children are happy, then we are limiting their development. I worry that trends such as this are contributing to the increase in child and youth anxiety. That children are not getting the opportunities to experience distress and resolution and repair.
We need to keep in mind that our children need us to Be Firm, Be Fair and Be Kind. As Barbara Coloroso says ‘Mean what you say, say what you mean, and do what you said you were going to do.’